My Holiday Schedule

So, I'm pretty excited for the holiday's right now. Here is a rundown of what's to come.

Tonight: CT Leaders Party at Buca, followed by Skate on State.
Wednesday: Storybook like Stars at Little Brothers (Depaso's band)
Thursday: Date Night with Hannah
Friday/Saturday: Personal Prayer Retreat to the Forest of SE Ohio
Sunday: Christmas Celebration with the Hauers
Tueday/Wednesday (26/27): Hocking Hills Overnighter with Hannah's older brother and his fiance'. We're finally going to explore Rock House and Tar Hollow State Forest.
Friday the 29th: Hannah's brother's Ohio marriage reception (they get married in Denver in January, that should be a cool trip).

New Year's Eve: Anyone have a good party going on?


whaat's up

I have two 15 page business ethics papers to write by next Wednesday. Anyone have an old ethical case study lying around I can use?


Halloween Party!!

Hey! Tuesday night is Halloween and its a time to party!
We'll provide great tunes, some food, candy, and drink.

But, you get to play a part....
Dress up in your best costume (Thrift Stores and Rag'O'Rama on High Street are great places to find an outfit) and bring your favorite snack, candy, or drink.

Best costume wins a $10 Starbucks Gift Card!! Thats right, $10 worth of coffee for just throwing on some old rags and putting on a wig. Where else can you find a deal like that?

Where: Jed and Matt Bartley's House // 111 East Hudson Street
When: Tuesday, October 31st // 7-10pm
Who: Anyone 18 or Over

RSVP by commenting or emailing me


She Checked Yes!!!

Saturday, October 7th was a great day. Hannah Hauer accepted my proposal of marriage, and near the end of next June we will be getting hitched. I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day. It was 70 degrees with blue skies, and beautiful autumn surrounded us at Blackhand Gorge. How bout that? I'm getting married to a beautiful woman. Is that crazy or what? I'm a lucky guy.



new cell phone - new laptop battery - new car
all in a week, life is not too shabby on the material end of things


pics from the NorthEast

Boston Subway

<- Give it up for Fenway! NYC Town Hall

long time coming

sitting in stats, bored to death.
good news / 2001 Mazda Protege given to me by an anonymous donor. God's not too shabby is he? I had a killer trip to NYC and Boston with Hannah. Great time with Chris in Boston, and some quality cuddling with Matty B and Cisco on the floor of Jon and Sara's apartment.


Need a Job?

My friend is leaving her Nanny position and it is available
Full Time w/3 Children in Westerville.
Comment or email me jeddearing@gmail.com if interested.


northeast by northeast

Labor Day Weekend = Boston and NYC

on the comeback trail...

last Thursday I had my first half day back at the office.
watch out world, I can stay awake for 4-5 hours at a time.

thanks for all your prayers and concerns.

check out this web comic
toothpastefordinner.com gets it done on a regular basis.

a couple things i learned from Memorial Day to Independence Day.

I'm not that important
I do too much
I don't do the right things
Athlete is good British pop
B Collision is going to have to grow on me
Jesus gives me confidence
I might have a man crush on David Beckham
I like Bonhoeffer and Wangerin
I miss my friends
I can't wait to move to Clintonville (August 1)
My Mom can come through in the crunch
I can't wait for the 2010 World Cup
I hate Christiano Ronaldo and every other preening/flopping/whining soccer diva
I miss worshiping with people and hearing the Word of God taught
A big church has some real issues
I'm completely in love with Hannah
There isn't a greater servant in the world than her



today has been a rough day, real tired. good news, the NBA finals are on.

so on wednesday night, 6/14, i tangented on my blog that I might be watching the emergence of Dwayne Wade as a superstar, and it has materialized. you could see it in his eyes and his movement that night. games 3-5 were an incredible display as he singlehandedly willed the Miami Heat into control of the series (with a little help fro the refs) after being down 3-2. The true test is coming right now. O'Neal and Mourning are out with 5 fouls each and there are 7 minutes left in the game. the rest of the team is shooting 1 for 16 from 3 point land. Dallas is at home with the momentum, and is already shooting free throws after every foul. all signs point to a Dallas victory, lets see if Wade will arise. this will be fun to watch.

closer to 2 now

so its 1:30 and i'm still awake with mind racing, and a heart that is fearful, cautious, frustrated, confused, and sad after a conversation with a couple close friends. My body is so tired and worn down from this sickness, but my mind won't stop to let me sleep. I went into the conversation in prayer, but I haven't done a great job giving it to God since. Don't you hate when you think of things you wished you shared in a conversation as you are pondering it later on? I'm glad for these friendships that they are open books and so this story can continue to be written and i can bring my thoughts back to the table. This whole life of friendships and the attempt to follow Jesus is such a process. It would be nice if one conversation tidy'd everything up. Patience is a great virtue but in my life is strictly a fruit of the Spirit, nothing I possess in and of myself. Come Holy Spirit, come.

For all you out there praying, thank you and I could continue to use it. I was very tired after just a one hour trip to the office to meet with Mike Borst this evening (my first time I've been able to make it to the church since I've been sick!). Thankfully, the wonderful Hannah had dinner waiting on me when I returned and Matt dropped in for a conversation, which are never long enough. In other good news, I made a 20 minute walk around the Hauer residence last night, health here I come. Hannah and her parents have been a great help in that, taking me in to their home each weekend, feeding me, buying me herbal supplements, and watching over me, allowing me to sleep in peace for hours on end. Don't you worry Ruth and Cisco, I'm on my way.

In better news, here's Hannah and I during a beautiful day at the beach back in MD, sadly the first day of my sickness.



so i really enjoy the new hp commercials with shaun white and especially the one with Jay-Z.


the presence of God among the sick

Bonhoeffer writes about the importance of the minister regularly spending time with the sick because it administers God's presence.

Today God was present with me through the community of Christ. So I can hardly move around without my body starting to shake or needing to lay down and sleep for a couple hours and I had to go to campus for tutoring today because I've missed 2 classes. It was going to be a hard day.

Well, This morning Mari Hall came over and did my grocery shopping for me and wiped down our counters. Then Rootdown came over, made me lunch, and we had a great chance to share our hearts with each other. Following that Francine's small group including co leader Kelly Young, Katie Pakizer, and Anna Rimelspach brought me pasta, salad, breadsticks, dairy free chocolate chip oookies, and so much fruit, including melon. Then the ladies mowed our jungle like lawn.

On top of this I (tangent-I might be watching the evolution of Dwyane Wade right now, in 1 minute we'll know) come outside to the car, a bit fearful of how my body will hold up having to go out for so long and my car didn't start. So Kelly Young gives me a ride to and from class and while I'm in class she calls Andrew Sharp for me and he comes over to check out my car.

Tonight, Nate England grabbed me vitamins from GNC and Laura Young picked me up two movies from Blockbuster and I got to hear a cool story from her. Then of course, my lovely came over and prepared dinner for me and got me set for bed, even preparing my dinner in advance for me because I have to go into class for over 3 hours tomorrow night (please be praying).

How blessed am I? God has been so good in the middle of a draining day. I am going to sleep a lot tomorrow.

Thank you to everyone who gave and has been giving so much time and energy over the last 2 1/2 weeks. I don't know how I would have made it this far without you.

good for the soul

if one knows what is good for him or her, one will take the time to read The Book of the Dun Cow by Walter Wangerin Jr. I started it last night at midnight and finished it by 11 this morning with 6 1/2 hours of sleep in between. It kept my sick body awake ripping my emotions from the laughter that comes with a playful glee to sorrow, understanding, and longing which left me in pools of tears twice. quite strange for my normally collected being. God is good.... I am better for having experienced this writing. Beauty was contained within the pages.


"it was as if the melody had always been on the rim of her soul, waiting for the touch to release it."

from The Book of the Dun Cow


occupying my time

so here is a smattering of what has been filling my time other than being real sick the last 2 weeks.


Spiritual Care by Dietrich Bonhoeffer: a Fantastic book for ministers on spiritual care of the individual in the congregation. He has some profound insights on the role of the pastor in proclaiming God's Word into ones lives and allowing Christ to meet the individual and bring true healing. He really stresses the importance of insuring the obedient lifestyle of all those being cared for as the beginning place of all healing. You can tell he was a man who had sat down with many folks and knew how to see through thin confessions to the true matters of the heart and he was not afraid to speak law and gospel into them, much like Jesus with the adulteress. I appreciate the value he places on confidentiality for the minister and how it must be something kept even from the family. He urges that the parsonage should be a place any member of the body can walk into and trust that they haven't been "talked," about.

BodyPrayer by Doug Pagitt: a Great little book that takes a look at joining our physical bodies in our prayer. I have experienced the blessing of this in my own life previously and it is fun to read a little more about it. The book has about 30 different prayer postures with accompanying prayers and acripture texts along with journal space. So far, I've been hanging out with the posture for healing. I have been finding my whole being much more engaged in prayer. I like books that include practical elements to help you engage in your spirituality versus just being a book of theory.

Something Under the Bed is Drooling by Bill Watterson Classic Calvin and Hobbes is great reading right after I've popped 2 vicodin at about 11 at night or when Bonhoeffer is way too wordy and theologically inclined for my sickened state.

Music: Surprisingly, I haven't listened to muc, I've been preferring silence.

Athlete - Vehicles and Animals A decent Brit Pop album that gets a little silly with some of its synthy experimentation, but You Got the Style still has one of the best pop hooks I've heard in years.

Tom Conlon - Country Dog City Boy a great acoustic artist that my buddy Chris turned me onto. His simple songs really connect with my heart and their mellow nature is nice for my weakened state

Movies: again, only seen 4...even with being in bed for 2 weeks - if you have any suggestions not too much has seemed appealing.

Munich I'd give it 3 stars. It held my attention, Eric Bana gave a good performance and any Spielberg film is pretty. It had some intense moments, but it never quite captured my heart or seemed to have something that profound to say.

8 Mile It doesn't get much better than the VH1 edited version of an Eminem movie. I've never heard so many voices dubbed over or seen so many people flip each other the bird and forget to put their middle fingers up. Still, while this movie drags a little bit 2/3 of the way through, the closing is still one of the better climaxes I've ever seen to a movie. The rap battle at the end is like watching a great sports match, it makes you want to go out and learn how to be the best yourself. Curtis Hanson directs, (the same guy who made the masterful LA Confidential) and you can tell the movie has the touch of a great director, and while he was playing himself, Eminem doesn't do all that bad.

No Way Back A Russell Crowe, $5.00 WalMart bin classic. You know you are watching a good B movie when the opening scene included bearded and bald pierced and tattooed men with golf clubs, machete's, baseball bats, and axes walking down an alley after a scooter pulling a red wagon with a large box on it eerily comes to a stop in front of a cowering homeless man on a foggy night. And the action only continues from there..... Really not too bad, it held my attention, maybe even more than that Russell Crow bomb, Proof of Life.

The Constant Gardener I don't know how I feel about Ralph Fiennes in any movie, and I don't know why. But, he does a good job. Also, Rachel Weiss definitely gives her best acting job ever. It was nice to see her in a role with some substance and spunk. I really liked the love story. The journey to discover faithfulness is a cool one. Also, the beauty of Africa was haunting. The cinematographers did a great job.


mono strikes

so it's official - i have mono - which means at least another full week of just laying still in my bed feverish with my throat feeling like there is a mace in it. if you have a great book or movie you'd want to bring over i'd be grateful. and if you came with a treat that would soothe my throat, i'd be forever indebted. i am more ansy right now than i have ever been in my whole life.


Another Request for Prayer

I am still sick as a dog, I am going back into the doctors office this morning (2nd time in 48 hours). Please be praying for me, I've been sick since Sunday, haven't slept well at night since Tuesday, feel feverish, and like there is a drill in my ear and a mace in my throat. If I move for 15 minutes I have to lay down for 2 hours.

Because of that accounting homework is piling up. Plus, the Nehemiah Project and the CT Summer Kickoff are right around the corner, and I am now way behind on work for those. And I really miss my friends and coworkers. I don't really want to lay in this house for another day.

It is a time for healing...


elegant & tired

its been a long time. June is here, bringing with it new hopes, experiences, and dreams for myself and many good friends. The first 5 months of 2006 have been the surfacing of all my weaknesses in each resonsibility and relationship. I am praying for a season of peace to begin to address these issues. I need some time to be able to clean up the mess in the room rather than just stuff it in the closet.

already i feel this season of peace has been shot in the foot. I returned home from Maryland as sick as a dog - despite a visit to the doctor I am still not well and so i have fallen far behind on both work and school. Please pray that the magic pills would work and healing would begin. The Nehemiah Project and the CT Summer Kickoff are right around the corner and these both need my utmost attention. On the plus side I had a lot of great time in the word yesterday. If you haven't read luke 8 lately, you probably should.

alright, thats about all the energy i have, it is naptime again. If yo are the praying type, pray for the golf ball in my throat to subside and the earache to cease. Thank you.


it begins

a day of musical excellence is upon us - Eyes Open from SNow Patrol and Stadium Arcadium from the Chili Peppers both came out and the albums are good. more to come...

I used to be so full of my confidence
I used to know just what I wanted and where to go
More than ever I could use a coincedence
But now I walk alone and talk about it, when i know....

Hey - RHCP - Stadium Arcadium



my whole body is in pain right now, throat, head, knees. pray that I will heal up soon. my body is having struggles fighting off this sickness because of being worn down from the marathon. I had to stay home from Heritage today, blah.


i marathon

come get some baby!! I ran the Nashville marathon in 3:41. 4 minutes faster than my goal. boo yah. the last 3 miles felt like running on air. it was amazing. Nate England clocked in around 3:46, Buckles 4:20, and Borst 4:40. a Good day all around.


26.2 miles

be praying, tomorrow morning i run 26.2 miles! I'm in Nashville stying at Vince Gill's daughters house, how bout that.


Proverbs 18:1

"Loners who care only for themselves
spit on the common good."

this is far too often the summation of my actions....



i hear it's national poetry month....

A schism develops
Through which light erupts
Differentiating matter
Exposing and binding
A simultaneous implementation
Guidance towards hope


it's a mobile wordl

today my phone book filled up on my cell, all 300 entries are taken. it is time to retire my antique phone and purchase one that will allow me to move into the mobile age where every man, woman, and child no matter age, race, or religous affiliation sports a cell. it is no longer a world where one phone is shared by a family or people even tend to their office voice mails which only serve to redirect you to their traveling companion.

in brighter news than me having to shell out a couple hundred bucks the new RHCP single, Dani California was released today. Go here to listen. Frusciante was inspired to write the music by WU Tang's "36 Chambers." Stadium Arcadium will be a great album.


Rome Pictures

Take in these pictures from Roma! i think page 2 is my favorite, feel free to take and abuse them. I can't take credit for all of them, some of the pics are my boy Chris' and the camera I used was Hannah's, so enjoy these pictures made possible by so many.


on the mediterranean coast
the colosseum
the forum
back in london after a 5 day jaunt in Rome. enjoy some pics, I'll be back in town later on tomorrow night.


just for Matt Hamp
tower bridge at night
Saint Paul's from the southside
big ben at night
mmmm..beans, toast, and eggs for breakfast. Chris brought it to me in bed with a cup of tea. quite the friend.
for micah #2
for micah #1

football in the uk?

so i was out for a little run, which turned into a long run when i got lost, but thats another story (i really got to see london). As i was running through Finsbury park the last thing i expected to see was a football team with all their pads on practicing, american football, not soccer, on a cool March morning in London. strange.


our new scottish friend, Dave and Chris' bro, Tim. Dave bought us our first round tonight at the, "Oh! Bar."
the spires
tower bridge
description soon to come...

reggae in london?

so tonight i guess we will be hitting the thriving reggae scene in the Camden borough here in London. tomorrow, we will be strolling through London at night which should be cool. today's trip around the palace and the Westminster abbey was neat. All in all London has been solid, it takes a little while to get anywhere, like any big city, so we haven't fulfilled all our ambitions. But, I'd rather enjoy each day than rush through it. btw, we need to start serving steak pasties here in the US. Hearty, Healthy, and convenient, what more could you want for a couple pounds?

an adventure

hey all, the first 2 days have been quite a journey. I got to find my way to Chris' house from Heathrow by myself. (Ruth, you understand)I got to the airport and he wasn't there. The good news was that I made it without a wrong turn, bus, or tube line. Now, when I got there, he wasn't at his home or sstaying there this week, but thats a whole different story. I arrrived in London at 7am Friday morning and caught up with Chris at 1:30.

The food, tea, and beer have been great! Saw a bunch of sites today, once I get to a hotspot with my computer I'll throw a few pics online. Evensong at St. Paul's was haunting (you would have loved it Matt). Just had a great dinner with Chris' housemates and we're heading out for a night on the town with some friends tonight.


london calling/rome is burning

Tomorrow afternoon I hit the road for Detroit and will catch my flight for London! The wonderful students and leaders of CT are sending me on the trip as a Christmas present! How cool is that? I'm very excited, tonight I need to begin packing, find my passport, and pick which books to read. I assembled my playlist for my ipod mini already, just need to load it on tonight. its tough to figure out the tunes i want for london and rome when you have 4 gb's to play with. The cities call for such different music, although hopefully I'll purchase some new tunes overseas. I'll try to update regularly on my blog.
I'm gone from Thursday, March 9th-Sunday, March 19th, so don't try to call me, unless you simply want to hear the sweet sound of my voice on my vm.

oh yeah, Snow Patrol's new album is released May 9th, it is called, "Eyes Open." It is the same day that the Chili Peppers new disc hits the stores. It will be a great day for music lovers.


guess who's back

I couldn't have scripted a better Sunday.

Church was a blast, we were focusing on the contemplative stream of faith today and it was so good to take time to practice lectio divina together as a church and simply spend time in silence. Jim did a great job preaching and teaching today. I felt like we equipped folks well to begin to explore a contemplative life.

I had announcments this morning, which were short and simple, i liked that and because it was the contemplative week i wasn't supposed to be funny, which can be difficult at times.

I also had the chance to teach at SML for the first time and I had a good time in there sharing about Theresa of Avila and her writings on The Interior Castle. You can read the whole book here if you are interested in pursuing spirituality a little more. Theresa was a nun within the Catholic church who developed a profound personal relationship with God through a contemplative life.

Following church I got to take Tyler Stevenson out for lunch and we had a good chance to connect over some New China Express and NCAA 2006. I also had a great conversation with his Mom which really confirmed some promptings i've been feeling from God towards a neighborhood in Columbus.

CT was excellent, Ryder did a great job setting up the 4 Rooms contemplative experience for our students tonight. I was manning the unofficial 5th room which was for journaling and while in there God really led 4 guys to sit down with me and we had some incredible conversations and times of prayer. it was quite the reminder of why i'm in student ministry.

Finally, to top it off, I came home to Pork BBQ, rice, green beans, a bottle of Pinot Noir, dairy free ice cream, and peaches all prepared by my beautiful girlfriend, Hannah. Quite the way to end the day.



so when I started at Heritage in June 2001 there were about 12 of us on staff including interns. We took this staff photo today which includes 32 people and we are missing about 8 other staffers. It has been cool to be part of something growing. it is forcing me to grow faster than i want to. but, i love how each person on staff brings something fresh and unique to the team and awakens us to new possibilities for the church.

the gathering

hey everyone, tonight our gathering will meet at 7 at the Mansion for an evening of worsship/contemplation/listening. we won't be eating dinner together tonight until we break our fast for communion at the end of the night.


pondering creation

so this just came through on an email that goes out to students from a national evangelical student ministry. i'm not sure i am comfortable with it. the reasoning just seems a bit poor. adam's story is our story, the story of the human race. does it have to be a specific person? don't get me wrong, I'm not necessarily saying Adam wasn't a literal person. I just think the argument isn't the best and not just on the Adam piece. also, the attitude and sarcasm which accompany the message don't give students a good picture of how to engage in an actual personal conversation with somebody on the issue.

First off, let's get to the heart of the issue. The Creation account in Genesis is either literal and true, or symbolic and false. We can't have it both ways, folks. So let's start with the idea that it's symbolic and mainly consists of figurative language. A nice idea, but one made up by people wanting to reconcile scientific “evidence” with the Bible—so naturally they came up with a way to make the word “day” possibly mean an “age” or long period of time. The truth is that you won't find an honest Hebrew scholar that sees Genesis as symbolic.

Oh, and a couple other things. If Genesis is symbolic, then Adam and Eve are characters on par with say, Bugs Bunny or Hercules. But if that's true, then what do we do with this verse?

When Adam sinned, sin entered the entire human race. Adam's sin brought death, so death spread to everyone, for everyone sinned. (Romans 5:12)

In my mind, it's sort of hard to build a case for original sin stemming from a make believe character. I think it was tough for Paul to imagine that too, which is why he believed in a literal Adam—therefore, a literal Genesis. Notice too that Adam's sin brought death into the world—but wait a minute…if evolution is true, then death started a long time before that—which (once again) makes Paul out to be mistaken.

So now we have a problem. If we believe that the Genesis account is literal and true, what do we do with all the “evidence” that shows for sure it couldn't have happened that way? Because, of course, the scientists were there, right? And they caught it all on a tape, which you can check out at Blockbuster. It's called “I Filmed the Big Bang, but I did not film the Adam and Eve”… (note: this is sarcasm.)

No, they weren't there, and neither was I. So I guess both of us are looking at “theories,” and I just can't go with any theory that paints the God who gave us brains in the first place out of the picture.

So here's the picture. The Bible explains the origin of life, the universe, and everything as a six day miraculous series of events. Is this scientifically possible? Nope. Not from a human standpoint, which is maybe why it took GOD to do it? Imagine, a supernatural Being doing supernatural things…who would have thunk it?

Which reminds me, don't over think this issue. Better to use your brainpower on better ways to love God and love people, which is the greatest idea ever to evolve on this planet, wouldn't you agree?



sweet love in the process

the way Richard Ashcroft sings these words gives me shivers. Can't get enough..

so I'm prepping for this week's CT and as I'm studying Hebrews 11, this passage keeps jumping out, thanks Jim B.

By faith Abel offered God a better sacrifice than Cain did. By faith he was commended as a righteous man, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith he still speaks, even though he is dead.

may our lives of faith speak volumes long after we've fallen asleep...


big ben and the vatican

can't wait for March 9th - 19th.
I will fly to London and hang with Chris and his brother Tim until the 13th. Chris is working with a community seeking to restore the homeless in London, which I can't wait to learn from. I'm horrible at long distance communication and Chris is my oldest friend, so it will be great to have 10 days to catch up on life and dream togehter. plus, we will eat at some great pubs and hopefully hear some good brit rock. Then Chris and I will hop a plane to Rome and explore the city for 5 days. I can't wait to eat and drink great italian food and wine, explore the forum, pantheon, and vatican city. Tim, I will finally begin to put our plan we hatched on our long drives into action.

anyone have a digital camera I can borrow?

pondering John and the friendly skies

Jesus told them, "The right time for me has not yet come; for you any time is right." John 7:6

I've been hanging out in the Gospel of John for a little while...it has been so good for the soul....obedience, the Spirit, the major opposition he faced, and the timing of God have been the four big things jumping out to me.

I got to fly with Cisco today which was awesome, i loved taking off and landing, he does well as a pilot. sadly, as we were approaching the Marysville airport I started to get crazy motion sickness, and when we touched down it wasn't pretty. made the back half of the trip a little rough, but it was beautiful getting the chance to soar in the sky with Cisco and Diddy.

last night had a great conversation with the guys of our gathering....lent will be a sweet time this year. i'm excited to journey through it with our group.


our gathering

tonight the gathering will be split guys/girls. guys will meet at the Mansion and the ladies will meet at Kim Lewis' home at 7, pass the word.


new questions and old friends

last night was real solid, Brian Gillis came into town and we had a great time catching up at Damon's after church. It is good to be in conversation with someone who knows me well and to hear about the future that God is awakening for him. I could use a lawyer friend :)

Yesterday, Nate England and I went running, we were attempting 14, I made it 10 - it was so frickin cold, my body physically shut down, just stopped running... I was so cold that my nipples were actually stinging, thats cold. I was longing for Los Angeles the whole run, I'm glad our marathon isn't til April...and will be in Nashville. I'll need to pick up that extra mileage this week.

This NextGen Celebration Weekend went fantastically. Anna Rimelspach's prayer during the 11am service this morning just dropped me to my knees. it was so powerful, I love her heart. Tom and Mike both had solid messages to share and were really themselves. I had a lot of fun with my piece, it was one of the few times I've shared where I didn't incorporate a lot of my own stories. if you want to give it a listen or podcast it for later consumption it should be here by tonight or tomorrow at the latest.

This verse from this weekend is going to hang with me for a while...Beyond all question, the mystery of godliness is great 1 Timothy 3:16


sounds of silence

well, how can i begin to share about the last week?
Monday, I had the neat chance to meet up with Matt B and Jon M, looked at a cool little apartment in University Village. It would be a blast to live with those guys, although it would be my first time in an apartment. I like the prospect of living closer to the city, I will miss the 1.7 mile commute to Heritage....We'll see what happens.

Then Monday night was rather moving, the Sigur Ros show grabbed my heart, took it up and down and all over the place. Quite powerful, see them live if you have the chance.

I had my first ever Valentine's date which was pretty awesome, brought a little more meaning to the day. Hannah looked amazing, I did feel a little bit like I was going to prom, when I picked her up her mom snapped a bunch of pictures. Barcelona was quality as always, with live music as a bonus and a Jenn and Cisco sighting. Following dinner we came back to my place for a Hawaiian themed night cap complete with tropical drinks, fruit, the best imitation of Hawaii I could create in our front room, and "50 First Dates." Definitely a meaningful night.

Wednesday I finished another class at MVNU, it feels good to be moving forward, although I need to find my motivation again.

Thursday morning I had the privelege of speaking at Central's FCA which was a lot of fun. TJ and I had a solid time together, I'm enjoying our friendship more and more. I do really miss CT and all my friends there. Taking a week off always causes me to feeel so disconnected. I can't wait for Sunday night.

Speaking of Sunday, this weekend is a "Celebration of the Next Generation." If you have the chance to attend Heritage our high school team will be leading worship, I'll be sharing the message along with Tom F. and Mike B. And my boys Grant and Matt are taking the plunge and sharing a live testimony, It will be hopping.


soak it in

sigur ros tonight!


good 24 hours

Hustle & Flow was good, I came close to crying twice and I loved the creation of the music. Its definitely not a movie which challenges the lifestyle of a pimp, but it does a good job of showing the realities within it. The acting was great. Anthony Anderson totally surprised me, every role I see him in normally consists of him playing the big clumsy/goofy black guy, but he had a great turn in this, refined that character well.

I had some great conversations with young and old, along with meeting a lot of new people during all the services this weekend and Pastor Brian had some quality things to share about love, it must be defined, demonstrated, and duplicated. he was rocking the aliteration. simple, but good - communion was real meaningful. I also really enjoyed the short but sweet time with the adult leaders of CT tonight, I love my team - they all bring so much to the table, and what can you say about Team Carl! I had a great surprise when I got to spend some good time with Hannah tonight, didn't think i would, then our schedules worked out. She watched the Chili Peppers Live at Slane Castle dvd with me, listened to me gush about them, and is still with me. she must like me.


hip hop story

starting "hustle and flow," I'm looking forward to seeing what happens with it. i've been wanting to watch it for a while.

Jack Bauer Torture Report

Jack Bauer Torture Report

Check out my friend Noel's site -- If you like 24 you will enjoy it, plus there are torture report banners you can steal for your site.

all city pics

tj took some cool pics from the dialogue time at the all city worship night. it was definitely a great evening pursuing God with extended family.


grammy letdown

I was looking forward to the Kanye/Foxx and JayZ/Linkin Park combo's during the Grammy's tonight and I got off school early enough to see them. Sadly, both were just mediocre. Kanye and Foxx's was a little better, but they only teased us with the start of TOUCH THE SKY. The JZ/LP combo didn't even get to the NUMB portion of their song, instead bringing McCartney out on the stage, I understand the gimmick with the the whole white album/black album thing and the DJ Danger Mouse Grey album, but still, just let the boys rock.

On the bright side, my car is in the driveway and tomorrow morning I'll pickup the tags. heck yeah! And as a reward for getting a car Hannah is baking me an apple pie from scratch tomorrow night. Not a bad deal.

Alright, i took a break from homework, need to get back - trying to get ahead for next week.


on the tip of my tongue

Let me live that I may praise you,
and may your laws sustain me.
Psalm 119:175

found this while browsing through a journal from summer of 04, it is a good prayer. I might begin to pray this in the morning and take a break from, "the Jesus Prayer."

sweet answer to prayer

Thursday I will be sporting my new 1992 Honda Accord complete with a sunroof!! My Legacy didn't have a sunroof, that was hard. I'm excited for this one. Thanks for your prayers, God definitely answered them. His provision is good, tomorrow I'll pay the gentleman and Thursday I'll have my tags!!

I may just drive to the ocean for the heck of it Thursday night, just to drive, I will need to cruise for a long time. It has been far too long.

Healthy Group Life

Smitty's thoughts on life groups in our pastors meeting right now (gotta love wireless)

3 keys for good life groups, what do you think about them?

1. Healthy life groups require the leader to always cast vision about the greater good/purpose of the gathering. Always keeping the vision of the kingdom out in front of the group, whether you are having dinner, studying the Word, or worshipping.

2. Develop Participating Members (committed followers of Christ and partners with the goal of the church / basically, discipleship, just HCC's phrase for it.)

3. To get done what they came to get done

Life Groups need to be committed to the big work of the Kingdom and the personal lives of its members. Each member needs to see the heart of God, and as they encounter the heart of God that will bubble over into leadership for the Kingdom.


Daily Gospel Reading....

"At that time, Jesus got out of the boat,
immediately the people recognized him, and
ran about the whole neighborhood and began to
bring sick people on their pallets to any
place where they heard he was. And wherever
he came, in villages, cities, or country,
they laid the sick in the market places, and
besought him that they might touch even the
fringe of his garment; and as many as touched
it were made well. "

Let us be this frantic for Jesus and carry the belief that he fulfills the Jewish prophesy that the tassels on his garment will bring healing for the world.

oh my goodness

what a great weekend...

stole away with 11 great friends to a couple beautiful cabins in the mountains of MD. We hit the slopes of the Wisp Ski Resort, I was reminded of what a mountain was. Gosh I miss them. I was able to handle the black diamonds better than ever, boarding with Diddy and Ryder definitely pushed me. At the end of Saturday afternoon I was heading down the steepest slopes at my own choice. It is great to be forced to grow at something, peer pressure can be the best thing. I loved getting to cook breakfast and dinner together and eat with one another while being warmed by the woodstove. We enjoyed pancakes, eggs, chicken, potatoes, beer, and wine (Tim, the Honeymoon was great as always). The poker battle was fantastic, although I didn't fare so well (foiled by Hamp again!!) I have a great group of friends who are so relaxed and at ease with life, even when ski's are stolen of ribs are bruised or broken. I like hanging with folks who can enjoy themselves even in the midst of a bittersweet life.

On top of all of it, my heart is definitely being awakened by Hannah. Being with her causes me to want to follow Jesus with all I have and make space for the transofrming work of the Spirit more than ever. I so appreciated how she jumped right in with my friends and was at ease whether with or without me throughout the weekend.

I'm going car shopping tomorrow, pray for me - need something by this Sunday.



welcome back Mary J. Blige, be without you , gets it done


1:30 on a sleepless Monday night

Reading 1 Corinthians 13 tonight....it is a pretty startling picture of what love can be.....the part that really hit me was the last sentence, love never ends. As silly as it may be I think one of the most profound lyrics from the past few years is found in, "Hey Ya," by Outkast, if nothing lasts forever, what makes love the exception? I think that is a very legitimate question, especially with the way we've seen "love," end again and again.

Reading the passage you have this amazing picture of the possibility of love. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. It's as if paul is saying that over and against every imaginable situation love can sustain, it can push through, there is nothing too dark which can keep love from dying. But, this seems so contrary to what we see before us everyday. I wonder if the problem is that we don't tend to realize that this is what love can grow into, but that it takes work in spite of our feelings and circumstances, and that even above working on our faith we have to devote ourselves to it daily. always rethinking what it means to really love, always on the lookout for how to love, always giving space for God and people to speak into our relationships....

I mean if God is love. I mean he actually embodies it completely, it is not just a trait or an aspect of him, than as reflections of him, with his spirit moving within us we have an amazing capacity to express love as it is meant to be. And his greatest expression of love on the cross, was "love in spite of..." our sin, our marginalizing him, cheating on him, our neglect, our taking his love for granted (all the reasons relationships breakdown). So the good news for us as reflections of him is we are capable of this kind of love, right? That is what i loved about Eternal Sunshine, the idea that, "in spite of," all the hurt and everything they knew they would have to face with each other they were willing to love. In the beginning, God knows all our junk, but he looks past it to who we are, to all the things he wants to enjoy with us, to his desire be in relationship with us, to have us be part of his dreams and aspirations for the world, and to see us fulfilling our true potential. If you look at it, God's hope is stupid and fatalistic, because we can't possibly live up to all we should be, but his hope and belief don't allow him to give up on us and continue to pour out his love on us, because he isn't afraid of our brokenness or being hurt by us, and forgives and forgets. How awesome is it that he pushes our sin as far away as the east is from the west, never bringing it back up as ammunition in an argument or to guilt trip you, but he remembers and holds onto all the little things we do which bless him and others and blesses us now for those while still storing up treasure for us for later? What if that was the mark of a relationship, one that dealt with hurt, than let it go, and instead looked for ways to enjoy all the good things about a person and lavish them with gifts, encouragment, and affection?

Now, if God is love, and love is the most important thing, something we are capable of embodying and we are in a spiritual battle, not with flesh and blood, what is going to be the one thing demonic spirits attack? it has to be the capacity to love and to express that love publicly, right? Because when we love, in that moment God is best represented and there is no way demonic spirits want God to be seen. It has to be their prerogative to lie to us that its not worth it to forgive again, to go the extra mile, to expose our heart, to put the other person first, to apologize, to express love passionately and affectionately.....

Passionate expressions which show love, a love that reflects God's are one of the most spiritual expressions available.....in that moment we are giving and recieving something of God's love and awakening ourselves and everyone around that there is potential for love. This is something I am incredibly thankful to my parents for, they helped awaken me to the possibilities of love. they always kissed in front of us, gave each other massages, caressed each other, and still do, 24 years into their marriage.

it's awesome to think about the possibility that there is a love that never ends....and that it is available for us to experience....



i was asleep by 1 last night!!! this could mean that sleep is returning to my life.....waking up this morning I was wondering if after Jesus' return he will give us a year to just "be," where we can catch up on all the sleep we've missed before we begin partnering with him on the New Earth. That would be nice.



love always protects.

Gathering Changed

Hey Everyone, all the guys (Joe, Micah, Beau, Matt) have work tonight and can’t host our gathering, so we will get together for praise, lectio divina, and prayer at The Mansion at 7. (No Dinner Tonight, unless any of you wants to volunteer to buy us all New China?)

See ya then,



saw "the squid and the whale," tonight. The movie was written by Noah Baumbach who co authored, "The Life Aquatic." I've been wanting to see this movie for over a year, so I was glad when it finally made it to the Drexel Grandview. Matt B, Jimi, and I headed over.

The movie was a frank depiction of the realities of divorce told through the eyes of the two sons, one in high school, one middle school. The movie was an authentic portrayal of a season many of my friends have gone through. The acting was fantastic (Laura Linney always gets it done), and there were some moments to laugh out loud. It was bittersweet, much like Life Aquatic or The Royal Tennebaums. Some points were tough to deal with, not because they were grotesque, but because they hit so close to home and were moments of my own life or friends lives that I'd rather forget. But, in a strange way I think it is important that shameful moments are resurfaced. It is a good movie for an adult serving in high school or middle school ministry to see. It brings you back to the reality of the lives of the students that we are in friendship with.

2:59:45, I had my longest phone conversation ever tonight and it was good. I should have pushed for 15 more seconds to hit the 3 hour mark.


ecclesiastes 5:1 (the message)

Watch your step when you enter God's house.
Enter to learn.

but not just about him, about yourself. there is a lot in our heaert i believe God wants to show us, yet we get busy bringing him our worries, our promises, our relationships and don't go to his feet and say, "teach me." "teach me who you are, strip away my misconceptions. teach me who I am, unearth my heart, teach me your ways for me that I may follow."


on the upswing

nothing makes you feel better than when you are lying down on your couch sick, and you hear the door open and chicken noodle soup, sesame bread, and organic orange juice are delivered to you by a beautiful woman. And to top it all off she throws in a book...in the words of tj...reeeaaal solid.

The book is called a million little pieces by James Frey. It is all about James' fight for freedom in rehab from crack addiction and alcoholism. Seems like it will be real intense.


i feel like poop

not a good day to feel that way either..too much to do..probably means i should pray


I am an Artisan

ARTISAN. AdvisorTeam

I took this Temperament test on Tuesday along with everyone else on staff at Heritage. It is pretty accurate. The skill set is hit or miss, but the personality section hits close to home. You can click the link and take it for free yourself.

"Artisans are the temperament with a natural ability to excel in any of the arts, not only the fine arts such as painting and sculpting, or the performing arts such as music, theater, and dance, but also the athletic, military, political, mechanical, and industrial arts, as well as the "art of the deal" in business.

Artisans are most at home in the real world of solid objects that can be made and manipulated, and of real-life events that can be experienced in the here and now. Artisans have exceptionally keen senses, and love working with their hands. They seem right at home with tools, instruments, and vehicles of all kinds, and their actions are usually aimed at getting them where they want to go, and as quickly as possible. Thus Artisans will strike off boldly down roads that others might consider risky or impossible, doing whatever it takes, rules or no rules, to accomplish their goals. This devil-may-care attitude also gives the Artisans a winning way with people, and they are often irresistibly charming with family, friends, and co-workers.

Artisans want to be where the action is; they seek out adventure and show a constant hunger for pleasure and stimulation. They believe that variety is the spice of life, and that doing things that aren't fun or exciting is a waste of time. Artisans are impulsive, adaptable, competitive, and believe the next throw of the dice will be the lucky one. They can also be generous to a fault, always ready to share with their friends from the bounty of life. Above all, Artisans need to be free to do what they wish, when they wish. They resist being tied or bound or confined or obligated; they would rather not wait, or save, or store, or live for tomorrow. In the Artisan view, today must be enjoyed, for tomorrow never comes.

Artisans make up between 15 to 20 percent of the population, which is good, because they create much of the beauty, grace, fun, and excitement the rest of us enjoy in life."

best they can do?

Bush plans visit to super-secret spies

does this headline from CNN.com seem funny to anyone else?



Tonight included quite a surprise. I was commissioned as a minister at Heritage.
I showed up at the office today at 4 and Borst goes, "so are you excited for tonight?" I asked what for and he said, "your commissioning." That was pretty awesome news. I headed home to change because I was wearing Alan's sweatshirt with a coffee stain on it and my old tennis shoes. It was quite the privelege to be able to stand before the church with John Thomas, Aaron Zink, and Dan Euans and be recognized as a minister. The elders and pastors laid hands on us and prayed. Certainly a powerful moment, I am excited for all that God is calling me to at Heritage and beyond. I can't wait to see what God does. He tends to be pretty creative.

good night

tonight's CT was excellent...our students have such incredible thoughts about what it means to follow God in the midst of the envy which plagues us. I love that we have leaders who help to create a safe place for the kids to feel the freedom to share in front of 100 people. My friend Megan shared about her mom's battle with cancer and what it has meant to have friends who walk through the journey with her and how even though she doesn't always sense him, ultimately Christ fulfills the role of a friend better than any person could. She showed great courage, sometimes I forget she is a freshman - It has been a blast watching God work in and through her. The Spirit was moving, it is fun when you are aware of it.

also - laura young and i had a great talk about next week's ct - it could be pretty baller. If you want to come and worship in a new way, you'll want to join us, whether you are in 15, 23, or 48, CT starts at 7 in the auditorium. Linworth and Grace Point are coming over to worship with us and lets just say, "it's a time."

thanks conan

"'The Washington Post' reports that former D.C. Mayor Marion Barry has once again tested positive for cocaine. Apparently, police suspected Marion Barry was using cocaine when they noticed that he was Marion Barry. "

"People" magazine is reporting that Angelina Jolie is pregnant. Jolie's doctor said it was the first time he's ever seen lips on an ultrasound."


the slopes

if you live in Columbus the stars are beautiful tonight.....be sure to take a peek.

I had the chance to snowboard tonight, which was a great time. It was my first time on the slopes in 4 years and it felt like I had just stepped off, i was real surprised. I wasn't smooth, but I didn't fall often or have to pull up alot. It was nice to ease back into snowboarding at a hill like Mad River--how I long for the Appalachians.... I rode up with Fletcher and Taylor, real solid conversation with them. We talked a lot about how envy drives us and its consequences in our hearts and in the lives of those around us. good stuff. Met up with Brandon and Hannah when we got there, Brandon completed his first successful run down the hill with no spills- he improved at a quick pace tonight.

All in all it was a great warm up for what should be a fantastic trip to the WISP in MD, the first weekend of February. I am so excited for that trip. It will be a great group of friends and we will be staying at these sweet log cabins in New Germany State Park.

I'm pumped for broomball tomorrow - should be a solid evening. 8:30-10:30, we have the chiller rented out. peace....


such great heights...

I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate that God himself
Did make us into corresponding shapes like
Puzzle pieces from the clay
True, it may seem like a stretch, but
Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled
Head when you're away when I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

does songwriting get much better than this?
I've been listening to the Iron & Wine version the last 5 days and i everytime i listen to it i am swept away by its lyrical beauty even more.

ok - i need to sleep...

grace and mercy triumph

today was the single most draining day since September for me. I was in prayer and conversation on one decision from 11am til 6pm. I almost made a really dumb move, and thankfully God was all over it and blitzed me from every side, rescuing me from a situation which would have alientated a close friend in ministry and sent me down a dnagerous road in how i make decisions. God's grace was to smack me around and wake me up to what I was doing, while my friend and his mercy gave me room to fall and get back up again. It is so good to see the Spirit of God preserving me. Thank you God.


a friend, Josh, who is 18 just had his 38 year old mom Debbie taken to the ER with a heart attack. Please be in prayer for Debbie's healing and that Josh and his dad, Harold would be comforted. Thanks.



Then I was the craftsman at his side.
I was filled with delight day after day,
rejoicing always in his presence,

rejoicing in his whole world
and delighting in mankind.

A Hebrew Proverb and my prayer for myself and fellow believers everywhere today is that we could echo this cry of Wisdom (Jesus) as we are being transformed more and more into his image as God's work of new creation.


no faith left

can i watch the nfl anymore - i don't think so - I've been contending all year that it is rigged and now i know it. i'm, i don't even know what to say - this is the worst officiating i have ever seen, they can't be this bad without being paid off.

the steeler's polamalu intercepted manning of the colts and they overturned it, when there was no indisputable evidence - i hate this - i am so angry right now - this is poop. there has never been a worse call in the history of football.


I am so high right now

my heart is leaping and my smile exploding. the chili peppers are releasing Stadium Arcadium on May 9th - these next 4 months will be sweet torture as I wait with baited breath to get my hands on the 24 new songs being released on the new double disc offering from the boys who fill my soul everytime i hear the sweet sounds of Frusciante's guitars pulsing through my speakers. OH ZAM!

I can't even explain, maybe i'll have to do a chronicles of Chili Peppers post to share how so many of their songs have changed my life at integral points and pushed me towards God and loving others. YES,YES,YES!!

And season 5 of 24 starts tomorrow, its NFL playoff weekend, Moltmann's Jesus Christ for Today's World is causing me to fall in love with Jesus in a brand new way, and tonight I get to devour peanut butter cream pie made with soy - my first expereince with a non-fruit pie - what a weekend.


conan for the soul...

"'It's been reported that New York Jets coach Herman Edwards is planning to quit. This comes as a shock to the fans who had no idea the Jets had a coach.' "


rush to the top

In only 5 days this has become the second most played song on my itunes.

Coldplay w/Michael Stipe: In the Sun, live at Austin City Limits. A Joseph Arthur Cover

I picture you in the sun wondering what went wrong
And falling down on your knees asking for sympathy
And being caught in between all you wish for and all you seen
And trying to find anything you can feel that you can believe in

May god’s love be with you
May god’s love be with you

I know I would apologize if I could see your eyes
’cause when you showed me myself I became someone else
But I was caught in between all you wish for and all you need
I picture you fast asleep
A nightmare comes
You can’t keep awake

May god’s love be with you
May god’s love be with you

’cause if I find
If I find my own way
How much will I find
If I find
If I find my own way
How much will I find

I don’t know anymore
What it’s for
I’m not even sure
If there is anyone who is in the sun
Will you help me to understand
’cause I been caught in between all I wish for and all I need
Maybe you’re not even sure what it’s for
Any more than me

May god’s love be with you
May god’s love be with you


When God comes and renews the disrupted and deranged world, it is not extraordinary that the sick should be healed and the germs of illness disappear. It is a matter of course. Jesus' healings are 'miracles of the kingdom'. In the daybreak radiance of the new creation of all things, they are not miracles at all; they are entirely a matter of course. Moltmann



i had a long conversation with a friend about regrets tonight and it has got me thinking about what strengths have resulted in my life from these.

I think one of them is my persistence in asking good questions and being able to speak the truth in love to people. I feel like this arose because for so long I put up a front/lied and was concerned with image management and no one ever probed or called something more out of me. My heart is to see people free of the need to control their image and I continually find myself sickened at how hard it still is for me to be entirely transparent, even with my closest friends. Thats why i like the ones who are willing to wade into me and ask questions.

can't sleep

i can't sleep and i need to be up in 3 1/2 hours.


neither reading, writing, listening to sigur ros, watching u2 live in chicago, or cleaning up my inbox have helped. at least i'm almost to 40 on the u2 dvd, such a good song, almost like it is divinely inspired or something.

new gathering


We will be cooking dinner together for our initial gathering tonight at The Mansion. If you or anyone you know isn’t connected into a life group and would like to come out as we begin this new community we will get going at 7. If you can email me if you are coming it would be helpful in planning the meal.

God’s really been stirring a couple things on my heart lately.

Ø First, I’ve had a real craving for community that goes beyond a Bible study where we all spout off our opinions on a passage only to leave at the end of night unchanged and not really understanding the state of each others hearts.

Ø Second, I’ve desired for sometime to be part of a gathering that would be welcoming for long time Christians, beginning Christians, returning Christians, and non Christians. It may seem like a wide gap to bridge, but I believe it can be done and is the healthiest way to live.

So, beginning tonight I’m going to be hosting a gathering at my house along with a few good friends on Tuesday nights. It is going to look different than most other groups you may have been a part of in the past. Each week of the month will have its own unique feel. Here are my thoughts so far, they’ve been shaped by conversations with each of you and I hope they continue to be shaped by our desires as we grow together.

The first Tuesday of each month we’ll actually cook and eat a meal together and well, that’s it. Just spend time together concocting brilliant recipes, slaving over the stove, feasting, and cleaning up. I believe there is real value in serving and eating with one another. It creates an easy place to connect and invite in folks who might be new to the journey or new to our crew of friends.

The second week would consist of asking questions of one another. Guys and girls will be split so that we can really get into the depths of our hearts. The idea here is that we will each bring our experiences, walk with God, and questions to the table and delve into each others worlds.

The third week we’ll go out, sometimes it might be doing something spiritual together, other times it could be something fun, the idea will be that we get to experience something new together and build memories which we couldn’t sitting around in the living room.

Finally, the last Tuesday of each month we’ll come together for worship, prayer, lectio divina, and confession. This night we’ll also spend substantial time apart as guys and girls to focus on matters of the heart.

So there’s that…if you feel like this is a gathering you’d like to be a part of we’ll be coming together at THE MANSION tonight at 7.


elegant & tired

You know when it hurts to do the right thing, the thing you've been coached well in and understand?? Yet everything in you pushes against it... then God gives a verse like this after you obey and confirms in your soul that you've done the right thing. He's good like that.

You will say, "How I hated discipline!
How my heart spurned correction!

I would not obey my teachers
or listen to my instructors.

I have come to the brink of utter ruin
in the midst of the whole assembly."

Proverbs 5:12-14



i think i'm addicted to checking my email - i'm not sure i ever went longer than 20 minutes today. I have had wireless everywhere and on my work laptop outlook pops up a little box when i have a new message.

the significance of my work probably rides a little too much on the amount of emails i handle in a day - it certainly doesn't always mean i'm getting work done. But it feels good to answer quickly, it even feels good to write someone telling them a project won't be completed til later. it still feels like work is getting done.

then when you get thos emails from old friends or new ones that are sharing prayer requests or funny stories from the day a smile comes and the day is good. email is probably one of the primary ways i feel connected to people, both vocationally and relationally.


nice way to start the year

Best Wishes to Tim and Jenny Evans on their new baby girl, Reagan. They will be great parents.